When God Blesses Us With Brokenness

“The Lord is good, a refuge in times of trouble.  He cares for those who trust in him …” (Nahum 1:7)

How does one write about it? The sins of her family. Having tried to do so for the past four years, the words just wouldn’t come.  For to do so would have been dishonoring to my siblings and my mother, and therein lied my stumbling block.   As a child of God who lives in a place of brokenness due to acts of family members whom I love, the Lord was simply telling me I was not yet ready.  I had much more to learn. But now that I have spent much time listening to God, I realize that to not write about the pains that come from sinfulness would be, in all truthfulness, dishonoring to the Lord Almighty—the one who truly loves me.  For God takes sin seriously, and for me to sit idly by as my family embraces their sins is in and of itself a sin.  It is a sin against the One to whom I owe everything, when in fact I am called to bear witness to His holiness.  The sins I speak of that have a stronghold on my extended family are similar to those of most families … drug addiction, sexual immorality, and false religion, as well as greed, lying, false accusations, slander—or shall I just say, narcissism.

When God first placed in my heart the desire to care for the family land after my dad’s passing, I had no idea what plans he had in store for me; and I still don’t know.  At first I believed Steve and I would just go on tending to the land, as my dad and his siblings had done with no real goals in mind.  But after my dad passed, it became clear to me—God wanted me to put distance between myself and my family so that I would grow closer to Him and know that He alone is my refuge.  Now that we call the farm our home, and with this distance, I can definitely see that through this brokenness God is shaping me into the person He wants me to be.  And, oh, what an amazing feeling that is!

Pictured above, Steve is determined to proceed with the roof renovation despite dangerously cold temps.  The rafters have arrived, as shown below, and he is excited to get them in place.  May God continue to give him strength to see this project through to the end.

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